Whether you’re in a relationship, just getting over one, or have been single for some time – I feel this write-up is a friendly reminder that we could all relate to.
When’s the last time you did something for yourself? I’m not talking about buying yourself shoes or getting a facial - I’m talking about doing something for your mind, heart, and soul. Self-care is essential for our well-being. Really, it is. You’re also sadly mistaken if you think you can give parts of yourself, energy, and love to others if you aren’t giving those things to yourself first.
To be completely honest, I don’t think I really understood self-care entirely until recently (and frankly, I’m still learning). I thought if I drank a green juice and went on a hike then I was so in-tune with myself and the universe. Yes, I’m from LA. Don’t get me wrong, those are wonderful healthy choices, but taking real care of ourselves is much, much, more than that.
What I’m learning is that self-care includes working on myself from the inside out. It’s controlling your mind, strengthening your body, and feeding your soul so they can all come together as one. With all three in alignment you can elevate your lifestyle and be the most fulfilled version of yourself. This process makes you conscious of the energy, emotions, and information you allow into your life. Because at the end of the day what you put in, is what you put out.
Now to be a bit more intimate with you I’m here (and ready) to share with you my very own personal process that I’ve been going through. I would be completely bullshitting you if I sat here and said life has felt like a breeze for me lately. Yes, incredible things are happening in my life that I’ve been working hard for and I’m beyond grateful, but like most successful things it took a lot of failures to get here. Does that make any sense to you? Regardless, I am a firm believer that the circumstances you’re in should never hinder you. It’s best to ALWAYS capitalize on obstacles and use them as an opportunity for growth, reflection, and to show yourself (just you) what you’re made of. Let your character shine in tough times.
With that said, here are my self-care tips that have been helping to catapult my soul, my heart, my mind, and my career helping me become a stronger, wiser, healthier woman.
Let go of negative words, emotions, relationships, thoughts, and habits. If it’s not feeding your soul, it’s draining it. If you have the power to change the circumstances, then change them. Don’t panic if you can’t! Use it as a learning experience and whatever you do, do not let the people or incident consume you.
Everyone is so big right now on cutting people off - but really – LET GO. If someone isn’t good for you no matter how much it hurts at the time, it’s imperative to love yourself enough to let them go. Happiness isn’t found by holding on to a person or situation that is causing you confusion, anxiety, or pain.
Every morning I wake up and I write a minimum of 3 pages or more per day. When I feel the urge to vent or want to call someone (that I probably shouldn’t) I open my journal and I let it all out. I express my gratitude, write down my affirmations, I release everything so I can spend the rest of my day focusing on more productive thoughts. It’s free therapy and the best part is - no one can judge you!
Another thing I start my morning off with is my daily devotional. It feeds my soul, keeps my heart in check, my faith strong, and starts my morning off positive.
For the past two weeks I haven’t turned the T.V. on in my room. I used to have a really hard time sleeping, but now I read until my eyes get so incredibly heavy I PASS OUT. Reading calms my mind and feeds my brain. Remember, taking care of your mind is essential for self-care.
I’ve always known that words have power and we attract what we think most about. But now I am more conscious of the words and thoughts I speak. Every morning (and throughout the day) I repeat to myself what I am going to attract and how I’m going to feel. It sounds silly, but it’s made a difference. Now that I am in control of my thoughts, my thoughts can’t control me. That is worth sounding silly.
Working out is therapy for me. What’s better than sweating out all those toxins, feelings, and stress? It releases so much emotional and physical tension. There’s a balance with exercising believe it or not. Don’t stress being there! If you aren’t feeling it – take the time off! I recommend you try to get in at least 3-4 times a week to release endorphins (which make us happy).
I’ve been setting goals (short and long-term) and the more goals that I check off my list the more confidence I have in myself… and confidence is sexy and makes us all feel good.
When you take care of yourself from the inside out the last step to feeling and being fulfilled is giving back. Take time to volunteer, help a friend, or help someone on the street. Remember, making someone else’s day will also make yours.
By Michele Maturo